Day 24: The Psychology of Happiness: Understanding and Cultivating Joy
While capitalism doesn't always sell this view, we can all benefit from seeing happiness as a state of being, as opposed to a goal or commodity. Too often, we are fed the idea that we can buy or achieve happiness through external means. If we get to holiday at that resort island, surely we'd become happy. Or if we could only eat at that Michelin starred restaurant we'd be one step closer. Promotion and new Tesla? Heck yeah, dictionary definition of happiness. Time and time again, we set a hurdle between ourselves and being happy. According to the U.S. National Bureau of Economic Research, rich and developed countries have amongst the unhappiest populations in the world, as measured by suicide rates, alcoholic problems, sleeping problems and cognitive difficulties. That is to say, there are developing countries with far less material and industrialised jobs, that experience higher levels of wellbeing. A good reminder and reality check that happiness is not brought about by material belongings.
There are many factors that can influence our happiness throughout our lives and yes, one can argue a lot of it is out of our control. Genetics, different personality traits, social connections, and life events all impact us differently and what we have to deal with. But if we can take control of the aspects that we do have control over, we can take ownership of our happiness and enhance our wellbeing.
While happiness is a very subjective matter and we can each find the most joy from different activities and pursuits, there are psychological models which can help us understand and attain what resonates most with us. Let's look at a few different Psychological Models of Happiness:
Hedonic Model of Happiness: Hedonism is the theory that happiness is a result of having more presence of pleasure or enjoyable experiences, over painful or unenjoyable ones. In this theory, to optimise happiness, one would pursuit pleasurable experiences and activities they enjoy. Balancing this, while we may need to fulfil our responsibilities, we will avoid activities that we don't enjoy to ensure we can maintain our happiness.
Now, there's a few flaws in this model of happiness. Obviously life doesn't always allow us to pursuit only pleasureable activities. But many of us operate in this model, by planning BBQs with friends and family, watching Netflix after work or doing something fun on the weekends. Given that these experiences give us positive emotions, connection and purpose, it can work to balance out the things we may not enjoy.
Eudaimonic Model of Happiness: This is the type of happiness or contentment that is achieved through self-actualization and having meaningful purpose in one's life. It posits that activities and pursuits don't necessarily have to be pleasurable to give us happiness. An example of this is volunteering at a food bank, which may be hard work but fulfiling. In these cases, the pursuit of fulfilment and growth contribute to our happiness by providing us with a sense of purpose.
Positive psychology: This area of psychology says that happiness can be cultivated through positive events and influences in life. Martin Seligman (Psychologist and father of Positive Psychology), says each person can build upon their strengths and set goals to direct meaningful behaviour. This is empowering and allows happiness to be attained through our own perception of what we do and achieve. By highlighting positive states, such as gratitude, resilience and compassion, we can change the quality of our relationship with our lives, leading to higher levels of happiness.
--
If we truly want to be happy, instead of constantly striving to become happy, we must actively practice cultivating it in every moment. Here are some practices we can incorporate in our daily lives:
Practice gratitude: Take time each day to reflect on the things you are thankful for, and express your gratitude to others.
Set achievable goals and follow through: Having a sense of purpose and accomplishment can contribute to happiness. Set achievable goals and take steps towards achieving them.
Engage in activities that bring fulfilment and purpose: Identify activities or hobbies that you are passionate about and make time for them regularly.
Invest in and develop positive relationships with others: Spend time with people who bring positivity and joy into your life, and make an effort to strengthen those relationships.
Engage in acts of kindness: Helping others can bring joy to both the recipient and the giver. Look for opportunities to perform small acts of kindness, and make it a habit.
Practice mindfulness: Pay attention to the present moment and focus on the good things in your life, rather than dwelling on the negative.
As with any personal development and behaviour change, it’s a good reminder to focus on personal growth and learning, rather than being fixed on limitations. Joy and happiness are complex emotions and happiness varies from person to person. Of course, it's not realistic to expect to be happy all the time, but by removing the mindset that we will be happy when something external happens, we are giving ourselves an opportunity to incorporate happiness into our lives more often.
Don’t we all deserve more enriching, fulfilling lives?
